


Wilting Petals

by Moonalight



Series: Guertena's Keeper [2]
Category: Ib (Video Game), Magic Kaito, 名探偵コナン | Detective Conan | Case Closed
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Angst, Blood and Gore, Custom AU, Fluff, OOC, Panic Attacks, Pre-Relationship, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:02:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 11,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25880278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonalight/pseuds/Moonalight
Summary: After the events of 'White Rose', Saguru must work to piece himself back together alongside the others that remember.
Relationships: Garry/Ib (Ib), Hakuba Saguru/Kuroba Kaito | Kaitou Kid
Series: Guertena's Keeper [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1873792
Comments: 6
Kudos: 29





	1. Memories Aflame

**Author's Note:**

> To be clear, you most likely will have to read the previous work to keep up with this one.  
> The story has taken on a life of it's own and due to the situations of the AU a lot of the characters may be OOC.  
> I hope you enjoy the read! Questions are welcome and reviews are appreciated!

******  
Saguru was glad for whatever Akako had done. As the raging flames spread over the old wood and canvas, not one member of the task force turned to look. They saw nothing even though the very thing they were supposed to protect was burning to ash right in front of them. 

He saw the look Nakamori-san sent towards him though. The ones that remembered, that had had their memories return, they saw what was happening. And just like Kuroba, who was now sitting beside him, they all looked viciously proud to see the work burn. 

As paint flecked off and the canvas curled under the heat, Saguru felt like he could breathe again. He hadn’t truly recognized until that moment how much weight had been settled on his chest. Not until it was being pulled off, piece by piece.

He heard the inspector getting back to work. There were questions, many questions. Had KID done this? How did Sonoko get injured? Where had the owner disappeared to?

Saguru could only be grateful that Nakamori was flexible, and understood that the truth wouldn’t be welcome. For now, he just let his head tip back and took a breather. A hand moved to rest over his and he grasped it, squeezing reassuringly. A squeeze was sent back. They had made it out, alive, though mentally scarred.

Just another scar to pile onto the others. 

“Kaito,” a female voice broke through their bubble of peace and both boys turned to look at the lost girl standing behind them. Aoko looked awful. Her spiky brown hair was knotted and snarled like she’d just rolled out of bed. Her shirt was speckled with blood in some places, and her usually vibrant cobalt eyes were red and puffy from breaking down. 

Not that she remembered of course. And Saguru didn’t want her to. It wasn’t something she shouldn't have to remember. 

“Aoko,” Kuroba’s voice was exhausted for a split second, but then he was releasing Saguru’s hand and leaping to his feet. The flash of a grin, wide and full of teeth as he placed his arms behind his head languidly. His tone was suddenly light and teasing as he spoke, “Looks like you were right; this wasn’t a KID heist! Doesn’t seem to matter much since your father still couldn’t catch the guy though.” 

It was amazing how quickly the spitfire girl shifted into defensive mode. Her hands finding purchase on her hips to immediately shoot back, “Dad still protected the painting, didn’t he? Just like I said he would! Besides...what even happened?”

Couldn’t keep her off the scent for long. Her eyes flickered over to where Sonoko had been led away to meet the paramedics, arm sliced down the length.

At least it hadn’t been her rose.

“That guy dosed us,” Kuroba lied through his teeth, shrugging as he tried to play down the events of the evening, “It must’ve caused us to lose our memories of what happened right before. Suzuki-chan will be fine, so don’t worry so much! It’s not anything to cry over.”

“I wasn’t!” She scowled, turning on her heel in preparation to leave, “Let’s just get out of here and go home.”

She made it only a few steps before realizing that her friend wasn’t following.

“Kaito?” She asked again, another slip in vulnerability. She really didn’t understand what was happening here. Waking up in a room, not remembering passing out in, and finding someone missing and someone else injured? That was something that could eat away at you. Saguru almost felt guilty as he watched the nervous girl pointedly avoid looking at the floor a few feet away that was stained red. 

“Sorry Aoko,” Kuroba was still smiling, but his poker face was failing. His grin wasn’t as wide, eyes not as mirthful, “I promised Hakuba to stay and wait on news for Suzuki-chan.” 

She was surprised, and hurt. She’d never heard Kuroba call his name without the honorific, and she’d never expected her childhood partner to choose another over her. 

“Then Aoko will stay too,” she stammered, planting her feet again resolutely.

She couldn’t. There were too many things to discuss. Things she could no longer be a part of.

“Go home Aoko,” Kuroba told her quietly, voice stern in a way Saguru rarely heard. Especially towards her, “Your father keeps looking at you worriedly. Wouldn’t it be better if he knew you were home safe?”

It was true. When she turned her gaze, she met her father’s tired one. The fight drained from her posture immediately.

“Yeah, okay,” she said quietly, dropping her head, “Aoko will go home.”

******  
Many of the others cleared out after Aoko. Saguru wasn’t sure how long Akako’s spell would last, but he hadn’t wanted to get caught next to the burned painting when it finally broke. He and Kuroba were sitting cross legged on the uncomfortable couch in the main lobby. They watched as task force members filtered in and out. They listened as the crowd outside began to leave; informed that this wasn’t a KID heist after all. They waited for the other relevant members of this conversation to escape and join them.

Saguru pulled out his pocket watch, thumb tracing over the silver horse slowly. A click and then the clock face was open to him. He watched the hands tick, comforting him more than anything else could. 

6:57:12. 

They had only been in the shadow gallery for a few minutes by this world’s standards. To them it had been hours. 

Kuroba’s hand squeezed his. He was reminded of Gary, of Ib. They would always find themselves holding hands too. It was a reminder that they were connected, were safe. Saguru wasn’t sure when Kuroba figured out that the action was calming for him. Maybe it was just something Kuroba found comfort in. At some point though, it had become normal to have his newly realized friend’s hand in his.

Mouri and Edogawa didn’t stay long after what happened. They both were quick to rush off after the ambulance, worried for Sonoko. Kazuha was quick to follow them, furious as her partner refused. Hattori had just waved her off, and promptly sat on the other side of Saguru.

He didn’t speak yet, just sighed and tried to get comfortable on the annoyingly thin cushion beneath them. Now they were just waiting on the inspector. Hopefully he could come up with a plausible excuse to bypass the paperwork for the night. 

The silence didn’t last long. Hattori broke it as they watched yet another group of guards rush past. 

“We doing this without Sonoko-chan?” It was a reasonable question. One that Saguru had been pondering as he caressed his time piece. The best option available was one that might be a bit difficult.

“Knowing Sonoko,” he started, letting his eyes slip shut as he explained, “She’ll have convinced them to let her out by morning.”

“So just wait ‘til then?” He sounded annoyed by the idea. At least this whole situation hadn’t completely changed the Osakan.

“Consider this a formal invite to my estate,” Saguru sighed, the energy burst was already starting to fade, “You can all spend the night, and we can discuss the details in the morning.”

“Are you sure, Hakuba-kun?” His eyes opened again to take in the sagging inspector that had suddenly appeared in front of him. He looked exhausted, just like the rest of them.

“Yes,” he shifted, “I’ve already informed my driver. She’ll be here soon, with a car big enough for everyone. Provided you can all get away for the time being?”

Kuroba didn’t even need to answer. He was in this for the long run.

Hattori took a moment to think it over before answering, “Kazuha can head back without me.”

Nakamori looked to be struggling the most, deliberating between one option and another. His words were halting as he spoke, “I think I can get out of the work tonight since this wasn’t actually KID, but Aoko...”

He fell silent as he thought about his daughter, a sigh on his lips and suddenly he wasn’t Ginzo Nakamori; head of the KID task force and respected inspector. He was just a tired dad that never had time for his daughter. 

“Does she remember?” He asked finally, “I noticed that some of the others...well...” he motioned with his hands to the group surrounding Saguru. A clear indicator of what he meant. 

“No,” Saguru told him gently, trying to soothe the parent’s pain, “I’ll explain more in depth later, but, besides us and Sonoko, none of them remember what happened.”

That seemed to make the decision for him. His whole body dropped into himself as he gave, eyes duller than Saguru had ever seen them as he answered. 

“Then I’ll be joining you.”


	2. A Brother's Concern

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Saguru, dear,” Baaya, bless her heart, reached back over the seat with the white cased phone in hand, “You left it in your room.”
> 
> A quiet mutter of thanks and then he was staring at the lit up screen.
> 
> Blue Rose.

******  
Saguru thought his caretaker’s shock was completely justified. It’s not everyday he got into the car with a police inspector, classmate, rival, and with red staining parts of all their clothing. She deserved a vacation. 

Nakamori-san took the front seat beside her. He was still quiet, but managed to grant her a quick word of gratitude before turning his attention to the window. 

Kuroba and Hattori were quick to take up places on either side of Saguru. He found himself wedged in the middle of the back seat, two silent teenages caging him in. 

Honestly? Saguru thought the saddest part of all this was that it wasn’t the strangest thing that had happened to him in recent months. There was the time he had rode the tube while covered in pig’s blood and holding a fisherman’s spear a few months back. That still trumped this quiet car ride. And, technically, less police officers were involved this time. 

His eyes were starting to fall shut, content with the slow rocking of the car coaxing him to sleep...

Then his phone rang.

The sudden noise had everyone jumping, stares turning to the half awake blonde detective fumbling to find where he’d left the device. 

“Saguru, dear,” Baaya, bless her heart, reached back over the seat with the white cased phone in hand, “You left it in your room.”

A quiet mutter of thanks and then he was staring at the lit up screen.

Blue Rose.

He couldn’t hold himself together. In an action that mirrored the inspector’s earlier, he slumped in on himself. His feet lifted from the ground to catch on the seat edge as he curled himself into as close a ball as he could while seatbelted in. 

Saguru didn’t have time to steel himself, not that it would’ve done any good, as the phone reached its last ring and he pressed answer. For a moment there was no one there, then he spoke up.

“Saguru?” 

The voice started the shaking. Small trembles in his arms, legs, and chest. Saguru drew his hand not holding the phone around his midriff in a half hug, curling even tighter. There were a few concerned murmurs around the car. Hands hovering close but not touching. They weren’t sure what was happening. 

“Saguru?” The voice asked again, stronger now, worried, sharp with a newfound desperation, “Are you there?”

“Garry...” his voice broke, watery and young. Despite his damndest efforts, Saguru couldn’t help the small sniff and blurry eyesight that followed. His brother’s reaction was instant. Protect. 

“Saguru, what’s wrong?! Are you okay? Where are you? Are you hurt?!” A barrage of questions Saguru had heard often enough. Even when it was just a nightmare and he was calling to make sure that, yes, Garry was okay or Ib was okay, Garry asked something along those lines when he realized that things weren’t alright. 

He knew he was expected to answer. Answers that were pulled almost unconsciously from his lips by that voice’s demand. 

“I’m in the car,” was the easiest question to start with, “Baaya’s here,” a promise of safety that would tell Garry he wasn’t in danger, “I’m...I don’t have a scratch on me...” 

This time, he’d made it through largely unscathed. So long as you don’t count the stitched together corpses and wide grin that danced through his mind every time he let his thoughts drift too far.

“Saguru, are you okay?” It was an even stronger demand, he could hear loud rustling on the other line as his brother rushed around his studio. Saguru couldn’t bring himself to answer. 

Because he knew what he would say.

‘I’m fine.’

So he said nothing at all. 

Then his phone was grabbed from his hand. He blinked once, twice. It took him a moment to comprehend what had happened, and before he could snatch it back Kuroba was handing it back to Baaya. 

“Garry,” she greeted the college boy on the other side of the phone without preamble, voice soft yet stern in a way only caregivers could be, “There’ll be a plane waiting for you and Ib at the airfield in two hours.”

And then she was pulling the phone away and pressing the hang up button.

The action made Saguru choke, a half aborted terrified noise in his throat. He wasn’t the sixteen year old detective anymore; he was the twelve year old boy. 

“Baaya,” it came out as a whine, edging on tears. He needed Garry. He needed that chain to keep him grounded. 

Again he had managed to shock his companions. They were seeing more sides to him than he ever wanted to show, but he couldn’t help the slip. Garry was safe and he needed that right now. 

“Saguru, my darling,” she tried, pale eyes meeting his in the rearview mirror, “You need to stay calm until he gets here, okay? Both of them will be here by six in the morning at the latest. That’s all it will take.”

On reflex Saguru pulled out his watch. The lid flipped up and he stared down at the ticking hands like they held all the answers of the universe. 

6 AM. Approximately eleven hours from then. 

He ran his index finger over the open lid, skin biting into the metal edges. Each little movement of the clock hands was a breath he took. Steady and free of wetness once again. He was coming back to himself, remembering himself. 

“Thank you Baaya,” he murmured, a deep breath and then, “When we arrive, please find each of my guests a room for the night. If at all possible it would also be best to prepare an extra one. I’m sure Sonoko will be inviting herself to spend the next few nights with me.”

“Of course, young master,” propriety in front of the observers restored. 

Saguru ignored the others just as they were ignoring him. None of them had the energy to be curious, to even speak. And so they rode in silence as they got closer to his home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, I love giving single children families. Seriously, why are most characters in media only childs?  
> Anywho, the babies are on the way for their traumatized baby.  
> Little note, Saguru does age regress. It was sort of tipped in the first work, but I wasn't sure how many people knew what it was? Nothing sexual, he just sometimes goes back to being a bit younger in his mind. It's not that uncommon with people that have experienced trauma.  
> For him it's usually between ten and twelve. It's a safe time for him. A time of family and friends.  
> Sooooo OOC, but you know what? I'm going to stop apologizing for that. The Magic Kaito family is so underdeveloped we make our own cannon, and I refuse to believe that a kid detective that has seen so much death and horror isn't traumatized in a lot of ways, excluding the whole evil gallery thing. Not to mention Kaito, I mean, seriously? He's a kid that's getting chased by police, shot at, threatened, and all while trying to find his dad's murders and avenge him, even though his dad might not even be dead! So, accept the OOC! Embrace it! Our children deserve more!  
> Sorry for the rant, I hope you enjoyed...


	3. If You Want the World, You Need Only Ask

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, no. Saguru can have a bi panic later. For now, he had some people to see.

******  
His feet were dragging as he led the way through the front door. The others weren’t as tired as him physically, but they were all mentally exhausted. Baaya took the lead as he slipped down the side hall. Thankfully, none of them questioned him going off on his own. 

He had something to do.

The familiar halls and rooms blurred with his only focus being a pair of large, twin oak doors. Rose carvings across the grain were a comfort to see. Names of his family members carved into the stems. 

The metal knob was cool in his grasp and with a light twist, the doors were open to him. Sunlight no longer filtered through the stained glass windows given the late hour. But the gallery lights were still on. He reached out at his side, hand trembling as it held itself. Just flicking down the light switch was almost to much. The lights clicked, powering off one by one and leaving him in darkness with only the shadows as company. He was done, his body was finished. His temple dropped to meet the doorframe, eyes fluttering. 

Paintings surrounded him. Sculptures every few feet on the wood floor. 

Saguru hated how he was somewhere else for a moment. 

“Hey,” his voice was hoarse as he switched to english, wavering with exhaustion and something else, “I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow, okay? Some things happened...”

He couldn’t speak further. Not only his voice gave out on him, but also his legs. 

His already abused knees never struck the ground. Lithe arms were wrapping around his waist securely. His body was twisted in someone’s grasp, pulled closer to warmth. Before he lost himself to unconsciousness Saguru saw familiar blue eyes looking down at him. 

“Get some sleep, Hakuba.”

******  
It was far past morning. 

“I really needed that,” he mumbled into his soft pillow, adjusting to the dim light streaming through his curtains. His digital clock read twelve-fourteen. Past noon then. There was a drowsiness clinging to him as his mind woke. The remnants of a deep sleep. 

It had been far too long since he slept that long. More than fifteen hours. He’d gone into a sleep coma, but the effects were too great for him not to feel elated by the fact. Of course, upon moving his joy dulled somewhat.

There was a bruising soreness in his knees and shoulders. Brought about by his collapses and being dragged. A sharp pain lanced through him when he shifted his ankles, and Saguru was reminded of nearly losing his foot. The strange part though, was the binding.

He shifted, pushing back the blanket to find himself bare chested and in comfortable sleep pants. The fabric on his leg was bunched up, revealing the white bandages encircling his ankle. Patches of ointment were stuck over his worst bruises; the only reason they weren’t hurting so bad he couldn’t move. 

A memory flashed of blue eyes before he faded. 

So Kuroba had followed him to his gallery and caught him when he passed out. It followed that he had also patched him up and changed him...

He took a deep breath, letting the air blow out through his nose as he tried to force down the ridiculous heat crawling up his neck. KID had changed him enough times at heists. This was no different. 

Except it was because this wasn’t just a split second under a cloud of smoke. This was slow, meticulous, caring, and in his room. 

Yeah, no. Saguru can have a bi panic later. For now, he had some people to see. 

His ankle had different ideas as he tried to stand. Instead, he was suddenly hitting the ground all too rough for his sore body. He let his head thump against the carpet in defeat. It was too much work to get up. His fist pounded onto the ground a couple times; something his guests would recognize. 

Why had this happened enough times for them to know what a simple pounding meant?

He waited and listened. Down the hall outside his room he could hear fast steps reach the top of the stairs. They then were racing down the hall, straight toward him. Before Saguru had time to wonder if he’d just made a really bad decision, his door was being thrown open.

The sound of the handle hitting his wall made him wince. Hopefully that didn’t result in a hole. But then he looked at the actual door and the potential home damage was forgotten. 

It was them.

His family.

“Garry, Ib,” he murmured, still looking at them askew, head tilted to see them properly. That was all they needed. Suddenly he found himself with a brown haired girl on his lap and his head in another’s.

“For a genius,” Garry said sternly, looking down at him with fern eyes filled with nothing but love, “You’re extremely stupid.”

“Stupid,” Ib echoed, fingers poking into his stomach angrily. 

“I have an IQ of one hundred and thirty-one,” Saguru shot back without thinking, staring up at him with a pout, “Society disagrees with your statements.”

“Oh yeah?” Oh no, he angered them, “Then why don’t you tell me what you think? Our idiot brother went into a situation he knew was dangerous without any backup, any help, and completely knowing the likelihood of what would happen. And then, because that wasn’t bad enough, he can’t even tell me what happened over the phone. So I had to go pick up Ib from school, inform her parents she was flying to Japan, and run without ever actually having a valid reason to give.”

...

He owed them the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so the crush has surfaced.  
> Also, Garry and Ib are blessings.  
> 'Nough said.


	4. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It took a bit of convincing to get his siblings to help him down the stairs...
> 
> Okay, a lot of convincing.

******  
It took a bit of convincing to get his siblings to help him down the stairs...

Okay, a lot of convincing. Ib had yet to release the tight grasp she’d taken on his hand, and Garry was hovering the entire time. Neither were willing to take their hands off him when he couldn’t even walk. 

And that’s how he found himself being carried bridal style down the steps. Unfortunately, in front of an audience. 

Baaya was in the midst of serving tea, but she stopped to watch as her charge was carefully transported downstairs. The ones she was serving also stopped to watch. 

Hattori looked delighted to see the embarrassing position Saguru was in. There was that mocking smirk he had come to expect from the tan detective; he’d almost started to miss it.

Nakamori just looked worried, ready to jump up if anything happened. Saguru was grateful to find he looked much better than the night before. Well rested and alive, dressed in one of his father’s old suits. 

Kuroba...Kuroba was taking pictures. Of course. 

But he looked alive again. Saguru could live with blackmail material if it made the boy smile that genuinely. 

His main focus wound up being the girl stretched comfortably over his couch. Her arm was propped up, wrapped entirely in bandages much like his ankle, but she seemed to be okay. There was the slightest waiver in her smile as she nodded to her cousin, and there was also that strength that so many forgot she had. 

Saguru tugged on the hem of Garry’s tank top, dipping his head in her direction. As always his intentions were understood. He was carried around the cushions and chairs of the living space to be set on the couch beside her. Not a second passed before her heels were resting on his left thigh, a silent assurance. 

A body plopped down on his right thigh, arms encircling his neck as Ib got comfy. She was careful to avoid kicking his injured ankle, half resting on Saguru and half on Garry as he squeezed in at his side. 

It was comfortable here. He was surrounded and safe. What pain there was in his body, quickly was pushed away by how his chest swelled with love. Saguru moved forward, nose pressing into the crook of his sister’s neck to breathe in that scent. The scent they all carried; of paint and flower petals. The faint smell of cherry blossoms also mixed in, coming from her long chocolate hair. 

The shampoo he had given Garry.

His gaze flicked to said boy, raising an eyebrow around the pale skin his face rested against. It took the lilac haired student a moment to figure out what he had done this time, when he did, he promptly turned into a tomato. 

That was a discussion for another time. Garry had promised to wait until she was older, but none of their audience knew about the relationship between the three of them. It was best if they avoided confusing them even further.

He let his hand drift, resting on Sonoko’s ankle. His thumb rubbed over the skin soothingly in lieu of his watch. The object had been seen on his dresser, but he had forgone getting dressed in the struggle of getting out of bed.

Probably why Baaya was casting him horrified looks. He was still shirtless and had a thirteen year old girl half draped over him. She wasn’t the only one either. Both Nakamori and Hattori looked like they wanted to say something but were holding back. Kuroba was forgoing the pictures this time in favor of a video. That grating, pleasing, grin fixed right on him. 

He knew Saguru saw what he was doing. The bastard just didn’t care. 

Sonoko? Well, Sonoko had known about his adopted family for years. She was practically his sister as well so there was no real reaction from her other than, “Hey guys.”

The hoarseness of her voice had Saguru pulling back from Ib, fixing her with a worried look, “Sonoko, how are you?”

She smiled, head tilting to rest more comfortably on the pillow under it, “I’m going to be fine. The doctor said there would be no permanent damage. I just have to keep it clean and take my medicine, and it’ll heal great.”

That was a relief. Seeing her arm split open had been a shock, but in the moment Saguru had only been able to focus on stopping the bleeding. No doubt it would scar though.

“Hakuba-kun,” Nakamori sighed, hands clasped together in his lap as he leaned forward, “Forgive me, but I would like an explanation.”

This would take awhile.


	5. Parent's Break to Parent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scrolling down, he stopped when he found the contact, ‘Father.’ 
> 
> ‘Father, Nakamori-keibu deserves a long vacation. If you wouldn’t mind?’

******  
It was a lot to take in. Saguru understood that, and he was grateful they let him tell his story largely uninterrupted. Baaya was kind enough to provide them food and drink during breaks when they had to take a breath. She took the whole thing very well. When Saguru asked her during one such break, she simply said, “I always knew something happened, dear, but you didn’t see fit to tell me. Now that you’ve told me, I simply know how to help you better.”

She was a true angel. 

The others took it in mostly in silence. By the end they were all sated in their curiosity about how Saguru knew what he did. 

He didn’t miss the fact that things had changed between all of them. He didn’t acknowledge it and neither did them. It was simply how things were now.

Nakamori was acting even more like a father, concerned and hovering as he learned about the horrors they had experienced as children. Hattori had stopped antagonizing him. A joke here, an argument there, but it lacked the heat it once carried. Sonoko was, well, Sonoko. She accepted all of it and by the end she only seemed guilty about the fact that she hadn’t known. It was like she made a promise to herself to make up for all the years she didn’t know, wedging in close to the three sitting on the couch with her. 

Kuroba was the hardest to read. Half the time he listened with an extremely serious look on his face, half the time he looked almost sad. Hiding his face in the chair’s arm and not moving for many minutes. 

No matter how they reacted though, when it was over they were all just relieved to know. And now he had to explain to another room. This day was really just becoming a big dump of exposition.

******  
Garry, Ib, and Saguru didn’t leave his gallery for a while. When they finally did, it was to find dinner being served. Not in the dining room though, someone had convinced Baaya to let them eat in the living room. At some point the room had turned from it’s home magazine cover look to an actually lived in room. Blankets were draped everywhere, pillows collected from their bedrooms, snacks and drinks on all the tables. 

They’d also found the remote to his flat screen TV. It was the most lively the house had been in quite a while. 

He curled up under one of the throw blankets that had been retrieved from a long lost closet. Saguru had never found the motivation to get dressed. Too much movement hurt his aching shoulders, and each step he had to be assisted with. So he sat half dressed, curled up on his couch surrounded by new allies and watching his collection of Sherlock Holmes. The BBC series.

Garry and Ib had yet to leave his side, not that he wanted them to. Ib was fit comfortably in between the two of them, asleep on the older’s shoulder. The sight was incredibly comforting to Saguru, who kept glancing at the two of them every few seconds as he waited for Garry to also slip off to sleep. 

Just like him, both of his siblings were terrible at sleeping on planes. Not to mention, with the time change, they should’ve been asleep a while ago. 

When soft snoring was coming from the both of them, Nakamori-san was sidling up to the couch arm rest and crouching in front of Saguru.

“Hakuba-kun?” His voice was soft, mindful of the sleeping figures beside him.

“Yes, Nakamori-san?” 

“I need to be getting home,” he said lightly, running a hand through his short black hair, “Aoko called, and she still thinks I’m working. Something that I also need to do...”

He sighed and Saguru was reminded of how human the sometimes overzealous and active inspector was. He was a single father, chief inspector, and still managed to find time for things on the side like caring for Saguru and Kuroba. Now he looked exhausted. His years were catching up to him as fast as those silver hairs were sprouting. 

Enough was enough. 

“I understand,” he assured the father softly, “Go to your daughter. You have my number if you need anything.” 

He nodded, sending one last quiet goodbye around the room before he let Baaya take the lead to the front door. As soon as he had stepped out, Saguru was picking his phone up from the coffee table it had been dropped on earlier. 

Scrolling down, he stopped when he found the contact, ‘Father.’ 

‘Father, Nakamori-keibu deserves a long vacation. If you wouldn’t mind?’

He didn’t often message his father. Typically they were both too busy for such things. When he did, it was usually something important. This qualified. He waited a moment, sure it would only take a second more...Buzz.

‘I will arrange it. Any particular reason?’ He smiled, eyes half closing. His father trusted him when he made such requests. This was one he should’ve made months ago. 

‘He is a single father and has not seen his daughter properly for weeks.’ He knew this to be true. Aoko and Kaito had called him multiple times to complain about the fact.

When they argued about Kuroba being a KID fan and her father being the inspector, it would typically lead to the fact Nakamori was never around. 

‘I’ll take care of it. This won’t happen again.’ Considering his own standing as basically being a single parent, Saguru’s father understood the importance of having time for his son. Something he was eternally grateful for. 

Hopefully Nakamori wouldn’t be upset about him interfering. 

He set the phone aside, turning back only to be met by teal eyes. 

“Don’t tell me ya reported ‘im for ditching?” Hattori looked like he was judging Saguru, hard, and Saguru could only scoff in reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I brushed over the explanations because trying to figure out how to do that was dulling my motivation. At a later date I might right the whole story of what happened in the game Ib, with Saguru included, but only if it's something actually asked for. I'm more focusing on the character interactions right now.  
> Hope you enjoyed, most of the chapters coming up are going to be talking!


	6. Friends in the Strangest Places

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey,” Hattori was suddenly snagging Saguru’s phone off the table, flicking it on without preamble, “Ya need my phone number.”

******  
“You really think I’d do that, Hattori-san?” There was a shift in the other boy and suddenly he couldn’t look Saguru in the eye.

“Stop being so fricking formal,” he muttered. He settled down on the carpet at his feet, back resting against the couch as he returned to watching the show without really paying attention, “It makes ya sound like a old man.” 

That...wasn’t quite what Saguru had been expecting. He looked down at the spiky dark head of hair just sitting there. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting. Maybe a, ‘yes, I think you would do something that bastard-like.’ But his actual response brought a new inquiry to the front of his mind.

“Hattori-s, uh, kun,” well he almost got it. His momentary mess up had earned him a glare and he’d been quick to alter the address. Seriously, why was he suddenly having so many people he had to address differently? 

“Yeah?” 

“Forgive me if I’m mistaken,” he frowned, tilting his head and sending blonde waves shifting, “but I was under the impression you hated me after the lavender mansion gathering.” 

And he was once again fixed with a judging look. There was a touch of color there as well, and Hattori looked away after a moment. 

“Ya really don’t mince your words,” he muttered, running a hand through his hair irritably, “I did hate ya.” 

That was blunt but not unexpected. The unexpected bit was the past tense phrasing.

“You don’t anymore though?” 

“...Nah,” he settled back against the couch, getting comfy again, “I had a bad impression of ya is all.” 

“And us all going through an impossible life threatening situation was enough to correct your impression?” Saguru felt like he was in a young adult novel. People’s feelings didn’t change that fast, did they?

“Well, yeah,” he sighed, muttering something under his breath before continuing, “The whole thing on the island was...really more my fault.” 

“Yours?” Saguru thought over it for a second. Sure Hattori had been antagonistic, but he had answered back just as rudely. “What exactly was it that set you off? Specifically?”

“‘Sides the ‘I’m a dick’ aura ya have?” 

“Yes,” Saguru nodded, leaning forward slightly so they could speak quieter, careful not to jostle Ib from her rest, “Most people react like that to me, but the exact reason tends to differ person to person. So what was yours?”

“Jeez,” Hattori chuckled, shaking his head at Saguru’s honesty, “Ya say that like it’s the most normal thing in the world...but I think the first thing that got to me was the fact that you were supposed to be a stand in for Kudo.” 

“Kudo Shinichi?” Saguru checked, remembering how angry Hattori had been about that. At the other’s nod he continued, “I wasn’t trying to take his place. I’ve never even met him.”

“Ah..” Hattori laughed under his breath, reaching up to rub the back of his neck nervously, “Yeah, I know that. And it wasn’t the only reason...”

“The hot-headed comments?” Saguru guessed, frowning. It was an honest observation. Surely it wasn’t something to hate someone over?

“Nah, I get those a lot,” just as he had figured, “it was what ya did with that woman. The way ya cared more ‘bout flirting than the murder.” 

Oh. 

Did he really give off such a player aura? 

“I wasn’t flirting,” he offered, adjusting his weight on the arm rest, “I was trying to get her out of the room so she couldn’t alter the crime scene anymore than she already had.” 

“...what?” Hattori twisted to look back at him, but the movement knocked his arm against Saguru’s ankle. He hissed, wincing and holding his breath as he waited for the flare of pain to fade. Quiet apologies streamed from the Osakan all the while, hands hovering and unsure of where to go.

“It’s fine Hattori-kun,” he sighed as the brief flare faded, “a little nudge won’t kill me.”

And Saguru wanted to kill his past self for being so vulnerable in the gallery because of the look of doubt that passed over the other boy’s face at his statement. Two panic attacks, almost three, and passing out from exhaustion. Not to mention the mini flash backs he’d had. It was so-

“Right,” Hattori drew him back from the thoughts of shame as he went back to their previous topic, “it’s just, ya know?”

Great, now he was expecting Saguru to read his mind. Garry had long since learned to stop doing that to him, and now he had to teach his new ally as well.

“No,” he sighed, “I don’t ‘know’. Finish your sentences Hattori-kun, I’m not a mind reader.” 

The room was dimly lit, but Saguru could still see the darker shade spreading across his fellow detective’s face. A small splutter, and then he spoke hesitantly.

“Well, I mean...ya didn’t actually know she was the culprit?”

Ah, so his mistake was also factored into the first impression. 

“Yes,” he agreed, “I followed the evidence to the false TV producer instead. You were right, being a thief doesn’t automatically make someone a murderer as well.” 

“Why though?” His confusion must’ve shown because Hattori was quick to clarify, “Ya must have a decent arrest record if you're working with the police. So why did ya mess up so badly?”

“Because I was working with the police,” a question Saguru knew the answer to and had quickly remedied after the fact, “At that time I had been working with the KID task force for a couple months. My view towards thieves was a little...skewed as a result.” 

“So ya had a preference for thieves when it came to arresting suspects?”

“I was actually staying away from other cases,” Saguru ignored the phrasing of ‘preferring thieves’ to focus on explaining himself, “I was only focusing on KID. That was my mistake and I started to take on other cases again right after that case’s fumble.”

“Ha,” Hattori looked like he had a lot to think about.

“Does that conclude your questions, Hattori-kun?”

“Ah, yeah,” he nodded, tipping his head back in thought for a moment, “Sorry for misjudging ya.”

“It is quite alright,” truly it was, if Saguru didn’t forgive misjudgment he would never be close to anyone. Besides, sometimes they weren’t misjudging, “Seeing as it is already late, you are welcome to stay another night should you need to.”

“Thanks,” Hattori pulled his phone out, bright screen lighting up as he turned it on, “I already told my folks and Kazuha that I’d be staying a bit. They were livid about me missing school, but what can ya do?” 

Right school. At some point it had been said in passing that Baaya had called Kuroba and him in for absences, but it hadn’t been his priority at the time. Lucky it was Friday. He wouldn’t have to take crutches to school if his ankle healed over the weekend. 

“Hey,” Hattori was suddenly snagging Saguru’s phone off the table, flicking it on without preamble, “Ya need my phone number.”

Saguru was too surprised by the statement to stop him. By the time he realized that he needed to, Hattori was already under his contacts list.

“What the-? None of these are names,” he cast a look back at him. Saguru was getting tired of the judgement. 

“Nobody knows who they're contacting except me,” he tried to pass it off as nothing, but the words only brought more discernment. 

“Ya seriously that paranoid?” Hattori began typing his number in as he spoke, shaking his head. 

“Ah, hey, hold on,” he couldn’t grab the phone back in time. Hattori clearing saw the message as it popped up.

‘This number is already saved as a contact.’ 

“The hell?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized this whole time Saguru has been calling Hattori by his first name so I went back and changed that.  
> Yeah I think they really got off on the wrong foot. They could be good friends if just given the chance, and I feel like Hattori would become super over protective of the London detective once he realizes how awkward he is. Like a little bird that doesn't quite understand how the world works at times. Other times he understands all to well.


	7. Carried Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But the grip on his hand was nothing but gentle, and Kuroba wasn’t taking any chances. Before Saguru could fully find his footing, he was being swept up like a bag of gifts and tossed over a shoulder.

******  
‘Hot-head.’ 

Perhaps Saguru’s contact name for Hattori was a little too obvious. He certainly would’ve been able to figure it out even without looking at the number it was listed under. But there was a more pressing matter on Hattori’s mind.

“Why do ya have my number?” 

That was a hard one. I mean, Saguru couldn’t exactly say he had paid an international thief to tell him the number just in case he ever had to contact the Osakan detective.

“Do you really want to know?” He tried, shifting awkwardly as he prayed that the answer was no. But of course, Hattori hated cooperating with even telepathic pleas. 

“Yeah, I want to know why ya have my phone number that I never gave ya.”

“I bought it from an info broker.” Half a lie, half a truth. It was a completely normal reaction for Hattori to blanch as his answer. 

“Bought it?” His voice rose slightly and Saguru nudged him in reminder of the sleeping bodies around them. He cleared his throat before continuing quieter, “Do I want to know?”

“I would prefer you don’t ask.”

“Then I won’t,” he sighed, switching Saguru’s phone off again and setting it aside, “I've dealt with ‘nough crazy stuff today. That can wait ‘til I replenish my curiosity.” 

Hattori shrugged, getting comfortable again and looking at the show still playing, “Ya know that not everyone speaks fluent english, right?”

“Sonoko, Garry, Ib, and Kuroba do,” he informed him mildly, “and you have passable english at the very least.”

“How d’ya know tha-never mind. No more questioning ya knowing things ya shouldn’t...not now anyway,” that was foreboding, but at least Hattori switched to a much safer topic, “Hey, I noticed ya bird hasn’t been ‘round. Where’s he at?”

“It's her,” Saguru hummed, curling closer to the edge of the couch so they could converse comfortably without speaking too loud, “and how do you know about Watson?”

“Doesn’t feel good, does it?” Hattori muttered before answering the question, “Ku-Conan-kun told me about the detective koushien. He thought it was interesting to find a falconry expert there.”

“I wouldn’t say expert,” he let his mind drift, half watching as Ms. Hudson joked about Sherlock and Watson’s relationship, and half answering Hattori, “I got her when she was very young. A gift from my father which also came with a falconry tutor. I know how to take care of her and what she needs, but I probably couldn’t do it with another bird.”

“Huh,” Hattori’s brows pinched together at that, but he didn’t bother asking about whatever thought had crossed his mind, “and she’s...?”

“Still in England,” Saguru sighed, thinking about his ethereal companion. How they would go out to the countryside and he would fly her for hours, watch her hunt, and just relax, “She abhors flying, in planes that is, as much as I do. I try to limit how often she has to travel back and forth with me. Every other visit she’ll accompany me.”

“So the next time ya go to England, you'll bring her back?”

“Yes,” he chuckled lowly, leaning closer to whisper, “If you wanted to meet her, you just had to ask Hattori-kun.”

“I didn’t-eh-hmph!” He huffed, crossing his arms and looking away pointedly. The conversation was apparently over. That was fine with Saguru. A wide yawn threatened to detach his jaw as he sat up. 

“Young master,” Baaya was instantly in front of him, watching in concern, “I can help you to your room if you intend to turn in for the night?”

“Nah, let me,” a different voice butted in. They all turned to see Kuroba standing off to the side, watching with an easy grin, “I’m heading to bed too. Might as well bring the young master up when I go.” His version of ‘young master’ was far more mocking than Baaya’s. Saguru saw the way she tensed, ready to refuse Kuroba’s offer of help, so he cut in before she could.

“I would appreciate that, Kuroba,” Saguru held out a hand, feeling Hattori shift out of the way so his classmate could approach. Baaya stood back to watch over the proceedings as Kuroba took his hand and hoisted him to his foot, right ankle held up off the floor. It probably appeared rough to the two watching, considering the way they both winced and Baaya started to step forward. 

But the grip on his hand was nothing but gentle, and Kuroba wasn’t taking any chances. Before Saguru could fully find his footing, he was being swept up like a bag of gifts and tossed over a shoulder. 

A gasp broke through his lips and he had to grab onto the back of Kuroba’s shirt to stay steady. The fabric folded under his hands, tighter, tighter. There was a hand entirely too low on his hips trying to hold him in place as his carrier started walking. 

He didn’t miss the surprised looks on Hattori and Baaya’s faces. He would’ve been surprised if he didn’t know about Kuroba’s night job. Carrying him like he weighed nothing was still embarrassing though. It certainly wasn’t good for his state of mind when that hand had to shift it’s grip to keep him still as they ascended the steps. 

He wasn’t tired anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for the boys in white to talk. Not time for naughty stuff though, that'll have to wait.  
> I was rewatching the last few episode of Magic Kaito, specifically the episodes with Kaitou Corbeau, and I realized Saguru looks good in black...I will do with this knowledge as I wish and I suggest anyone interested find the episodes on youtube to watch.


	8. Breaking Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Sorry,” he whispered, his own hands reaching up to frame the worried face looking down at him, “I’m sorry.”
> 
> “For what?” He looked so confused, his pale face twisting in confusion as he tried to decipher the meaning behind his apology.
> 
> “For making you look like that.”

******  
Saguru knew this wasn’t just about helping him to bed. Kuroba had been quiet for some time now, hardly saying more than a couple words since they left the gallery. Not that he was blaming him. Saguru still couldn’t get it out of his head; Kuroba going into shock in that room, completely unresponsive. Everytime he had looked at the magician since, that moment ran through his thoughts, clear as when it was actually happening.

The scene forced its way forward again as he considered his carrier’s motive. His hands tightened on the shirt in his grasp until his knuckles were white and trembling. His teeth bit into the flesh of his lower lip, hard enough that he started to taste iron. A small quiver shook his body as he tried to throw out the images flashing before his sight. The Reaper’s ‘beauties.’

Kuroba must’ve felt the shift in him. His steps picked up in pace, moving down the hall towards Saguru’s room even faster than before. The hand on his waist began moving in what was supposed to be a comforting motion.

It wasn't quite comforting, but it was distracting from the thoughts racing unbidden through Saguru’s mind.

A door was being opened, hand tightening to keep him in place as he turned to shut it behind him. Kuroba turned even more gentle somehow when they reached his massive bed. Crouching down so that Saguru could control when his good foot touched the floor, and then righting him to sit on the edge of his mattress. 

“Hakuba?” 

Without the contact he couldn’t stop the memories. They pushed at his walls against his will, forcing him to think, to replay the moment over and over. 

“Hakuba?”

Knife slashing towards Sonoko’s rose, blood dripping from her arm...

“Hakuba?!”

Kuroba emotionless as he went into shock, eyes empty and vacant and so limp in his arms...

“Hakuba!”

Carrying the doll-like boy, around the corner emerges a gloved hand, his...

“Hakuba, you need to breathe for me.”

His...

“Please Hakuba!”

Petals.

His face met soft fabric, hand pressing soothingly into the back of his head. Fingers weaved through his hair, distracting him from the...the...

In.

Out.

In.

Out.

The chest he was pulled into was moving. A pattern he could follow. In. Out. In...

“Okay?” The rib cage beneath skin rumbled with the word. Saguru blinked, feeling a wetness soaking the warm fabric he’d been against. Pulling back he found there to be tear stains across the front of Kuroba’s shirt. Matched by his drying cheeks and burning eyes. 

He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Trapping the air he so desperately needed. 

“Are you okay?” Kuroba asked him again, hand from his hair moving back to cup his cheek softly. Not trusting his words yet, Saguru nodded. 

There was life in those sky eyes. Not empty and blank like in his memories. But, they were sparked with something other than joy, happiness. They were filled with pain and concern, a hint of fear. Because of Saguru.

“Sorry,” he whispered, his own hands reaching up to frame the worried face looking down at him, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” He looked so confused, his pale face twisting in confusion as he tried to decipher the meaning behind his apology.

“For making you look like that.”

Sky widening, staring down at him like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. And then he was dropping, his knees meeting the carpet not roughly, but softly, controlled. 

Saguru looked down, hands falling back to his sides in surprise because of the sudden height shift. His head tilted as he watched Kuroba take a deep breath, hiding his face behind his hands for a moment. When he lowered them, they were held out for Saguru.

Where had that box come from?

A secure metal lockbox was rested in his cupped palms. Kuroba shifted his arms, nudging them closer to Saguru in invitation. He frowned, reaching out to do as was being indicated.

Gingerly, he flicked the lock and pulled up the lid. Inside, resting on red velvet cushions was his...

His...

Kuroba looked worried, watching him with wide eyes as tears began to bead down his cheeks once more. But Saguru couldn’t help it. Not when his friend was on his knees in front of him, offering back his...

His petal. His life. So sweet, so gentle. 

He couldn’t help it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, it all kind of hit baby at once. This chapter's a bit short, but hopefully the next one will even it out. I'm planning a pretty lengthy conversation for the two of them so hold on to your gliders!


	9. White Shade

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So maybe that wasn’t too funny, but sleep deprived Saguru thought it was the peak of humor as the laughs burst forth. He found himself completely pressed into Kuroba as his body trembled with laughter. The noise was muffled by the shirt against his mouth, but the effect was the same.

******  
It looked so innocent. Sitting there, pure a freshly fallen snow, and acting as though it almost hadn’t been the end of him. Saguru stared at the box now placed safely on the center of his bed. He still couldn’t bring himself to touch the lone petal. 

Kuroba had thankfully been patient with him. After the tears had stopped and ache dulled, he had joined Saguru on his bed. Still he was there, leaning back against one of the bedposts and watching the other with observant eyes. Unfortunately though, the messy haired boy wasn’t one that could sit still for long. He needed something to keep him interested. It was one of the many reasons he was so talkative. A good conversation kept the mind active, which was exactly what he went for. 

“So,” the lone word was shock in the since fallen silence, both of them flinching at the explosion of sound. Saguru lifted his eyes to look past the box to the shifting body at the end of his bed. Despite the rough start, Kuroba kept going, “I know you explained this earlier, but, if that petal had been hurt when he...”

His words tapered off, as though he couldn’t bear to finish the question, but Saguru knew exactly what he was asking. If the Reaper’s knife had pierced this lone rose petal along with the others, would he have dropped dead?  


"Yes,” the calmness of his answer didn’t mean he was actually calm over the fact. Saguru was just too tired emotionally and physically to functionally discuss almost dying. Again.

“And...now?” There was a flash of something dark through those sky eyes at the inference. Saguru didn’t have the effort to put forth to decipher what that look meant. He instead pushed all his focus on continuing the conversation. Would he die now if it was destroyed?

“No,” he exhaled, drawing his legs closer in an attempt to feel comfortable without moving his abused limbs too much, “We’re not inside of that world anymore. Now it is nothing more than a normal rose petal.”

“If you went back into that...world?” He stumbled over the word, clearly still disturbed by the idea of there being different realms besides their own. It was a completely normal reaction. It had taken Saguru a long time to get used to the fact that any painting had the potential to be a gateway between worlds.

“I would have a rose, just like you did,” and then Mary would remake his pendant. It was still far more useful than carrying around a flower and waiting for it to accidentally get crushed. 

“Right...” He ducked his head, hands flicking and suddenly a deck of cards was spread across the blanket. Kuroba began fiddling with them as he spoke, switching topics from the morbid tone they’d started. 

“Hey, so, I thought you hated Hattori-kun?” Well that was a surprise. The complete shift in direction left Saguru’s half-working mind spinning as he struggled to keep up. 

“I don’t hate him,” he said immediately, trying to piece together how he wanted to explain this, “Hattori-kun disliked me. And all because of a few misunderstandings which have now been cleared up,” he shrugged, “He’s not that bad of a person, really. Just hot-blooded, instinctive, and loyal. Like a bloodhound.” 

Kuroba stopped shuffling cards, his grip tightening so much that a few of them started to bend. 

“I see,” his jaw was tightening and Saguru tilted his head in confusion at the action. Kuroba was really confusing him tonight. 

“So you two are friends now?” He hadn’t said that.

“I only address him as such because he asked me to,” he pointed out, shifting as he got the distinct feeling he’d done something wrong, “He never stated he had any wish to be seen as a friend.” 

“Oh? Then what would you call your relationship?” Kuroba sounded distinctly confrontational. It made Saguru tense up, wincing as his bruises were jolted. What was wrong with his classmate today? Well, of course they almost died after getting stuck in a magical painting, but what was up with him being so upset? 

He didn’t blame Saguru, right?

That idea sent a thrill of dread through his heart. It chilled his bones, making him shiver as he considered it. Before he could fall again, Kuroba was kneeling at his side. His hand was on his shoulder and his low voice was calling his name.

“Hakuba? Hey, please don’t do that thing again.”

That made a bitter chuckle break forth, Saguru focusing on the spot where their bodies were connected to keep him calm.

“It’s called a panic attack, Kuroba, and I usually don’t have them so often.” Slow breaths, relax, focus on something safe.

Kuroba.

“How often do you have them then?” 

“As I said, they aren’t as common as they have been in the last...forty-eight hours?” He really hadn’t been back in Japan for long. What a mess. “Usually I have to be triggered by something specific. And the specifics don’t occur that often. But there have been...special circumstances the last while.” 

“Going into that world?” The hand shifted from his shoulder, to lace their fingers together comfortably as Saguru nodded. 

“That was the first time since what happened four years ago that I was dragged in against my will,” he sighed, head dropping onto the shoulder beside him. Kuroba tensed for the barest moment before he was relaxing and moving so he was more comfortable.

“Being pulled in, the owner choosing death over torture, fearing death around every corner, that...room...” 

“To be fair,” Kuroba’s tone took on a lighter lilt and Saguru could hear the smile in his voice, “there weren’t that many corners.” 

A laugh startled from him, falling more into Kuroba’s body as he tried to stop his shoulders from shaking and hurting further. It seemed that the magician had different ideas though.

“Wasn’t much of anything actually,” he mused onwards, arms winding loosely around Saguru’s body as he continued, “It was really only a couple city blocks, three rooms, and a couple halls. The most exciting thing about that place was the color choices. It was like the decorator couldn’t decide between it being super colorful or dull. Then said ‘screw it’ and tossed the whole pallet into the mix to see what happened.”

So maybe that wasn’t too funny, but sleep deprived Saguru thought it was the peak of humor as the laughs burst forth. He found himself completely pressed into Kuroba as his body trembled with laughter. The noise was muffled by the shirt against his mouth, but the effect was the same. 

He only started to come back to himself when he realized how stiff Kuroba had gone. Tilting his head back, he looked up to meet the other’s eyes. He was looking right back at him, head angled down and mouth set in a straight line. That dark look was back in his eyes, emotions battling for dominance to fast for Saguru to catch.

“Kuroba?” He asked, barely a breath as he tried to get enough air back in his lungs. The call of his name seemed to decide the battle because all at once new emotions were slamming down over his face. 

“Sorry, I probably shouldn’t keep you up any later,” Saguru blinked, lost at how quickly things had changed. Kuroba was smiling, soft and considerate, but he had no doubt it was a part of his poker face. And that hurt.

Over the last day he’d been with Kuroba he had rarely seen that poker face. He could now say with confidence he hated it. 

The arms around him removed themselves, very gently moving Saguru away from his chest. He blinked, mouth opening and closing but with nothing to say. Or too much. He couldn’t keep up as Kuroba hopped from his bed. In his grasp was that dreaded lockbox. Not a sound was made as he set it on Saguru’s nightstand, giving one last wish of ‘good night’ and then curtains were cascading around him.

Kuroba had pulled the ties on his bed posts all at once, hiding Saguru behind white fabric and contained to his large bed alone. 

What had just happened?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Baby doesn't recognize jealousy. How adorable!  
> Doesn't recognize lust either...  
> What? Did you hear something? I didn't.


	10. Formal Panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Why what, Hakuba-kun?” 
> 
> ...What? Why was there an honorific? Was Kuroba trying to make him have an attack? He’d only just been told a day ago that he was considered a friend, that they could drop the formality another notch. Was he taking that back?

******  
“Kuroba!” It was the only thing he could get out before the magician reached his door. It was everything and nothing all at once. It was all that was on his mind now, compressed to one thing.

Kuroba.

The figure beyond his canopy curtains stopped. A faint outline through barely transparent fabric. He didn’t turn, didn’t answer. Just waited.

“Why?” 

“Why what, Hakuba-kun?” 

...What? Why was there an honorific? Was Kuroba trying to make him have an attack? He’d only just been told a day ago that he was considered a friend, that they could drop the formality another notch. Was he taking that back?

His breath sped up. Distantly his thoughts reminded him that he was supposed to relax after a panic attack so he didn’t have a whole wave of them, but his panic wasn’t going to listen to reason.

“Kuroba!” He took a deep breath, choking past the emotions trying to drown him as he watched the figure actually turn.

“Hak-”

He couldn’t take it if there was an honorific. 

“We’re friends, right?!” It was desperate. He needed to know. If the answer was a negative then he could live with it. As long as he knew. As long as he could still be at his side.

“I-shit,” the curtains were being spread apart, and the top of Kuroba’s body was suddenly leaning towards him, guilt painting his features, “of course we are. I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking. I just added it without thinking because I was upset.” 

“Why?” He repeated his earlier question, searching over the boy’s face like the answer was hidden in how he was looking at the panicking detective. 

“Because, I...” One of Kuroba’s hands reached up to grab at his hair, pulling as he struggled to get the words out. The poker face was gone again and Saguru could breath, but he still wanted an answer. 

“Because I didn’t know!” 

He blinked owlishly, staring up at the hunched boy in confusion. “Know what?” 

“Any of it?” It was phrased as a question, like he didn’t know what he meant anymore than Saguru did. “I didn’t know about the gallery, your siblings, your attacks, your habits?” Another question. He couldn’t understand why Kuroba needed to know those things. Why it upset him so much. 

“You couldn’t have known,” Saguru tried, reaching out to tug on the wrist leading to Kuroba’s hair, the grip on his brown locks looking painful, “I never told you. You never asked.”

“I should’ve,” he argued, shaking his head as he released the vice grip on his scalp, “I should’ve known, should’ve asked. I’m a terrible friend.” 

There was a slight hitch before he said friend. Saguru couldn’t help but think he’d been about to say something else. But what else was there? Rival? Information gatherer? 

“No,” Saguru focused his thoughts on the guilty looking boy in front of him, softening his voice as he tugged him forward back onto the bed, “You’re a great friend. Really Kuroba. You’re insanely loyal, protective, kind, considerate, and funny. And so, so many more things I’m too tired to list.” 

A yawn pulled at his mouth to show how much he meant that last line. It prompted a laugh from his companion as they both fell into the bed together. Kuroba dragged by Saguru’s gasp on his wrist. 

“Thank you,” he murmured, face colored with embarrassment from his praise. Saguru smiled, nodding sleepily as his mind decided to start focusing on just how soft the mattress and blankets were. 

“Always...” His eyes were drifting, grip tightening on the wrist caught in his fingers, “Don’t leave me tonight.” 

He heard the gulp from his classmate, already drifting as the final words were muttered. Something he wasn’t meant to hear.

“You’re really dangerous, you know that Saguru?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...so I found out it is possible to have whole waves of panic attacks. It sounds terrifying. Of course, I'm a sucker for angst so I have to make my child suffer a little. Just not that much.


	11. New Buds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still alive.

******  
Waking up alone was precisely what Saguru expected. Strangely enough, that wasn’t what happened. 

He awoke pressed into something soft. His breath hot against his own face as he shifted against the fabric. Arms held him in place, wrapped tightly around his shoulders and lower back. He lifted his head to look up, finding the underside of a jaw above him. 

Kuroba nuzzled into his blonde waves at the movement, arms squeezing slightly in reassurance that he was still there. Saguru stared for a moment longer, recognizing the position he was now in, and then flushed from head to toe. 

He didn’t want to wake his peacefully sleeping companion, but the position was frying his brain the longer he had to remain. His own arms were pinned between their bodies because of how close they were pressed. He couldn’t move or disentangle from the limbs around him without waking Kuroba. The thought of doing so made him feel guilty. 

The magician probably needed sleep as much as he had. Over the last two days a lot had happened. 

Sadly, the decision was stolen from him as he felt the body he was pressed against begin to move. A low rumble reverberated through Kuroba’s sending goosebumps across Saguru’s body. 

Nope.

He shoved at the warm body roughly, freed from his cage and rolling back across his bed. Neither of them had moved under the covers so there was nothing to stop him from falling straight through his drapes and hitting the carpet hard. His legs were still propped up on the bed, safe from further injury unlike his shoulders which now ached painfully. 

“Hakuba?!” A head appeared above him, straight between his legs. 

Nope.

“Kuroba,” he choked out, throat convulsing as he tried to push back simply screaming in bisexual panic, “Ah-can you?!”

Bloody hell, please let him believe he was just embarrassed about falling out of bed. 

“Your shoulders,” he realized, crawling around the open legs to leave the bed. His feet touched down near Saguru’s head and he was finally given a second to breath. Reflexively he reached up to cross his arms over his face, trying desperately to hide the color shading his pale skin.

Click.

Saguru uncrossed his arms slowly, looking up at the unabashed teenager holding a phone that was pointed down towards him. 

“More blackmail? Really?” Kuroba shrugged, grinning widely at him as the phone disappeared from sight and he crouched down to help the fallen detective up, “What are you even going to use that for? Surely there isn’t anything you want from me.”

“It’s always good to have some tricks up your sleeve,” he told him sagely, careful not to let his legs fall to the ground as he maneuvered him back up to the bed, “Plus a little blackmail never hurt anyone.” 

“I’m pretty sure that is the definition of blackmail.” 

“No it’s not,” he huffed, snapping his fingers and suddenly the curtains around his bed were pulled back and tied back to the posts.

“‘Blackmail-the action, treated as a criminal offense, of demanding payment or another benefit from someone in return for not revealing compromising or damaging information about them.’” 

“...That sounded like you just quoted the dictionary,” Kuroba said after a moment, looking at him in disbelief, “Did you seriously memorize the dictionary?”

“I was bored,” Saguru muttered, turning away so he didn’t have to look at the ridiculous look of amusement on the brunette’s face. 

“But why the dictionary?”

“It was available? And it’s fun to throw definitions in the faces of people that misuse words,” the last sentence was a mumble, barely audible. But of course, the trained magician heard them. It sparked a laugh, Kuroba doubling over as his body shook with mirth.

“You know, you’re pretty fun Hakuba!” That really wasn’t helping the coloring in Saguru’s cheeks. 

“Anyway,” he twisted, catching view of his alarm clock; nine-forty-seven, “We should head downstairs if we want to get breakfast. Baaya won’t be able to keep the food warm together.” 

“Yeah,” Kuroba offered his hand, still smiling wide as he spoke, “Come on, tantei-san, food awaits.”

Neither of them acknowledged the address he used. Neither of them said another word as he was helped to his feet. Neither of them bothered to point out the shadows still lurking unspoken. 

Baaya would watch even closer.

Nakamori-san would get his vacation and repair his relationship with Aoko.

Sonoko would heal and return to being her normal peppy self.

Hattori would go home carrying new phone numbers and friends.

Akako would become an even closer friend than she already was.

Garry would remain his protective older brother self.

Ib would quietly watch and offer comfort as best as she could.

The others would never remember what had occurred that night.

Kuroba would apply more glue to hold himself together, moonlight always on him.

And Saguru would continue. Just as he always had. A new scar here, a broken shard there. He had more allies now; more people to turn to.

Who knew when he would next go through this again? He’d just have to keep going forward, held together by the bonds now connected to him. 

Still sitting on his nightstand, oh so innocently, was a small lockbox. Inside was a single, snow white petal. Pure and untouched. 

Still alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah so, I decided this story would end here. Not to say the whole AU will. I want to write a couple of one shots to explain a few things, some shorter stories, and maybe another long chapter story. But for now I need to wrap up a few of my other stories. Trying to write three separate chapter stories at the same time while also doing schooling is hard. Please bear with me!  
> If there's anything you want clarification on, or stories you want from this specific AU please comment and let me know! I'll try to expand as best as I can. Honestly, this series was the first fanfiction I ever wrote and I just sort of threw it all together. It's not my best work and I'm not completely happy with how rushed it is, sorry about that. Maybe one day I'll go back and rewrite it a bit neater.


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